Nick Clegg ate a sausage roll, cheekily. It was the peace talks, and he'd been allowed to come because he'd kicked up a fuss, the big baby. Barak Obama was in a corner, shooting the shit with the Chinese Premier. Nick had been left to talk to Joe Biden, who was the American Vice President incumbent, in case you didn't know. He felt a lot like Dougal McGuire, stuck on the kiddy table like this, whilst David talked to the important man about politics and stuff.
Joe Biden was laughing, because Nick had just said something intentionally funny, and it seemed like a logical response.
"Yes", Joe Biden scoffed, "That is so true". It was. Nick felt bolstered by the good reception his joke about Chinese people had garnered. He was worried it would be offensive. It was. But not to Joe Biden. Nick felt a connection growing between the two men, the two stalwarts of power. Maybe Joe would be his friend, he thought. His Bush to his Blair; his Jed to his Ward; his Dick to his Dom, but not in the S&M sense. Not this time, he thought. Joe Biden smiled a smile as big as a massive plate and Nick felt the warmth penetrate through him like radiation from the sun causing happy cancer. Nick reached across for the plate of sausage rolls and offered one languidly to Joe Biden, trying not to seem too eager to serve.
"Would you like another sausage roll, Dad?" Nick Clegg said without thinking.
"What?"
"Shit", he thought vocally.
"Did you just call me Dad?" Joe Biden asked, his smile disappearing back into his face like a startled vole.
"No", Nick Clegg lied. Typical.
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